Naina was in her room, a little exhausted
from today’s shopping, some boxes of jewelry lying on the bed, a pile of beautifully
handpicked sarees. So much had been done and so much was still left .Yes it was
her wedding time and not just a shopping spree. She looked at the clock and it
was three forty five in the night and she had trouble sleeping. What thoughts were
going in her head? Was she ready for this? What is arranged or love?
The Truth is we are never really
ready for anything till it happens; we can do some preparations, get cognizant about
it or even make a to-do list reading various articles but how it will really
happen we can never control or know for sure so readiness is a journey in which
we go slowly over time .Marriage is like our other relations which asks for acceptance
of the other person in their most crude forms. For Naina it was a marriage which
she had arranged partly and she was in the neighborhood of love. What kept her
awake but?
She was imagining herself not as
a bride but as a wife. What would it be like to be a spouse? How do married
people live? All these feelings were new to her and yet to be explored .I could
see a faint smile coming up on her face as she closed her eyes slowly. With the
temptation to know what was going on I became part of her imagination.
Her mind was full of flashes of a
life which was waiting for her : She had a comfortable couch in her house where
she was watching a romcom with a man holding her around the waist …They were
glued to their laptops for the next day’s meeting at their offices… and
exchanged smiles whenever possible…She massaged his back when he would come
back home late … he comforted her in those days of the month ….some days they
cooked together and other days they sat
and did their finances ….Somedays went in silence and somedays in complete naughtiness
…somedays were of narrating childhoods
and some days of house maintenance…those were the toes which met between the
sheets even after disappointments of the day …a passionate night with “ Hazaron
khwaishein aisi ki har khwaish pe dam
nikle….bahut nikle mere armaan lekin phir bhi kam nikle” playing softly and
filling the room with deeper urgency to make love …. And waking up with the
same man…who got a cold last night because you got too adventurous …. He won’t
be your ‘ A little French Affair’ which got over with a wild night neither is he
your teenage crush which got over because now he does not fit in your dreamy
world ...he would be your husband ..the man whom you would stand by even if he
is sneeze, nauseated or just grumpy because he is the one whom you will grow
old with …he will lose hair, your bosom will sag but the smile will remain the
same… and he is the one who will look at you in complete admiration when you
would be hormonally racked out and would remind you how you looked on the night
you first copulated .The days of reading together …celebrating together …days
of nervous conceiving …days of blooming into a garden from just a seed of start….days
of pulling each other’s leg and then caressing like the first rain on a thirty
land….the days of falling in love again and the days of remembering the initial
hesitations … the days romance which would transform into deeper understanding …may
be he won’t impress you each day but would always be concerned about you…may be
he would be your soul mate ..maybe he would not.. because it would be beautiful
enough to have a companion to walk along…the flashes were so many and it was
morning already ….she looked at her solitaire ring …refulgent and well cut … Naina went to take a shower with a towel in
her hand and ebullience on her face.
I wait for you somewhere
