Cafe and my Closed Eyes

I was sitting in a nearby café drooling over the menu (had missed my lunch even today) and puzzling my fingers with a up down drill.Ahh! Yes, I finally settled for an Irish coffee and a Vegetable Grilled Sandwich. It had been a queer day for me since the first time I had attended the nature’s call. Well talking about food I could just see snow white rice all around me(a Northern in Southern India) and for God’s sake I was not ready for another ‘no hue day’. To talk about studies my books continued to be hostile, forget about peace I could not even see armistice. I had forgotten to attend my class as had I kept sleeping and then there was no one to go out with me in the evening. Leaving all these aside there was something gooey in my head which was creating sporadic tremors. That is when I decided to come to the café to relax over a cup of coffee.

I have closed my eyes and I could hear ‘The Carpenters’ softly singing ‘Yesterday Once More’ to me. Just then it struck me why are we so much intoxicated with our past. We miss things, people we have met, places travelled over and definitely ourselves of what we were some time ago. It’s not we hate or are in love with our present keeping it impersonal but there is something about these memories which allures us and we become a living Time Machine ourselves without sitting into one in particular. We long for those rainy days from school, our first day in college, the sophomore night outs, our first dates, ‘Rakhi letters’ from sisters, numerous mistakes - in grammar, in conversations, in relationships and yes when you were so confused about your career choices. Even though they create only an ephemeral simulacrum but they are like the dark chocolate which leaves the taste in your mouth. They play like a reel making us listen to only want we really had enjoyed listening to without any turbulence. Yes of course there are obnoxious reminiscence which haunt us or hurt us deeply but they after a considerable period of time become irrelevant and just become a reason why you are confident today and how you make better decisions with life.

But why do we do this time travel so often? May be we keep trying to figure out the meaning of life. How thing could have been, how things would be and maybe if it stops suddenly and did we live it up to the mark as we just had one (I am really not certain of reincarnations).Even if we think so much about it or ruminate not at all we still would be left with a next day which might be sunny and just the way you wanted it or maybe just too gloomy to even wake up for but we do open our doors to know what it would be.

With a little smile on my face and eased temples I woke up to the present and what it had to present me was my order which had turned cold losing the grill effect and the Irish coffee gone long back to Ireland. I paid the bill and went back to my dwelling with a dorsal thought of solving the next exercise.Oh! Lord I am now thinking of ahead.

PS: Einstein said that Time does not exist probably because we always have a parallel world inside our head.